Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Laughing at myself


Today I am home sick. When I finally made it out of the bedroom and into the living room, I sat down at my desk to use my computer.

After a few minutes, I saw a man crawling through the bushes towards the window. So, I did the first thing that entered my mind. I hid. I leapt from the chair and cowered in the corner just to the right of the window. My heart was racing. I wondered if he had seen me. And THEN I realized something. He wasn't crawling towards the window. He was crawling towards our gas meter. He was just the meter man.

At least, I hoped he was the meter man. Because no sooner than I had my epiphany, I saw the same man walking to our front door.

You guys? I was so brave. I answered the door. But had he been ten minutes earlier, he wouldn't have been so lucky. Because I would have still been wearing my teddy bear robe. Which means, I still would have been hiding in that same corner, praying he wouldn't peer in through the windows to see if anyone was home.

What am I going to do when I'm a mother? I'm supposed to be the brave one. But no, I'll probably just tell my kids to hide under the bed with me when we hear a scary noise. I mean, if dad's not around. Because if dad is around, he's getting the baseball bat. (Right, Andrew?)

10 comments:

Andrew said...

I'm pretty sure I only have a wiffle ball bat, sorry. I would probably opt for that sweet ax I was carrying around during G-20.

Hillary said...

I'm glad that he wasn't a murderer.

Melissa Maris said...

Hahaha this is a great story. I remember once in high school, my friend and I were sitting by the kitchen window at my parents' house when someone came down the front walkway. She and I slid off our chairs and hid under the table. Better safe (and hidden) than sorry, right? :)

Oughta Say No said...

I've done the EXACT same thing. Only I ended up in the bathroom, door locked, with the biggest kitchen knife I could find.

PS. I moved. check here. http://oughtasay.blogspot.com

Sandy said...

So funny! My biggest fear is that someone I actually know will come knocking at my door and I am still in my old raggedy pajamas at 2 o'clock in the afternoon...wait, that actually did happen. Did I learn my lesson? Nope. I still edit photos at my computer all day in my pjs any chance I get!

Her said...

You crack me up. I think I would try to throw on yoga pants super fast to avoid being seen in my rattiest pjs, but I think I probably would have hid in a corner too. Oh, yeah.

Unknown said...

I would have done the same thing but I blame all the "CSI", "Law & Order" and "Criminal Minds" for making me paranoid and thinking every stranger is a serial killer.

Kyla Roma said...

lol! Oh no!

I would have totally done the same thing though, you don't know! Robbers are tricky! ;)

angelasw said...

lol you send the kids to answer the doors! They'll be younger, so they'll bounce back quicker :-P

Vanessa said...

Hi! This is my first visit to your blog...and I think I'm in love. Thumb wrestling AND grilled cheese sandwiches? Be still, my heart...

I hate answering the door when I'm home alone. How dare people invade my space when I'm enjoying it boyfriend-free? Hmph.