Happy Thanksgiving

I'm heading to my parents' house for turkey tomorrow. After we are stuffed to the gills, Andrew and I are driving four hours towards Asheville, North Carolina. Friday, my 25th birthday, we will drive the remaining 3-4 hours to our destination and spend the weekend relaxing in a cabin with Andrew's parents.

I'm not really sure what our days will entail, but we are going to see some crafts, eat some local grub, and go on a hike--if my cold allows.

There's definitely going to be some serious gaming, lounging, and snacking too.

I haven't decided if I'm going to bring my laptop with us on the trip, so if you don't hear from me for a few days, don't fret. I'm in the safe hands of a merman and his family.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I think Santa finally lost his marbles

You know how bloggers are taking their time to thoughtfully prepare gift guides for the holidays? Well, I'm not one of them. Instead, I want to show you some of the biggest wastes of money I have ever laid my eyes upon--all found in the newest Bed Bath and Beyond "1001 Best Gifts and Beyond" circular.


First, we have the Wallet Pix: Carry up to 58 of your favorite photos wherever you go with this mini-digital photo album, which features a 128 x 128 crystal clear color display and is small enough to fit in your wallet, pocket or purse. $14.99

I find this extremely unnecessary, especially in the age of high tech mobile phones. If you really want to bore That Guy Sitting Next To You On The Airplane with photos of your kids' kids... wait until you land and quickly bust out your phone. He'll never see it coming.

The next completely idiotic gift idea that I have for you, is the Krups Beertender.



The Krups BeerTender®, for the ultimate at-home draught beer experience, was designed for the beer connoisseur with an aversion to reading the instruction manual. The, BeerTender® is simple to use and was designed to work exclusively with the Heineken® and Heineken Premium Light® Draught Kegs®.

Okay, so this thing is advertised in the Bed Bath and Beyond circular for $279.99. That price tag is the first problem. The second problem is that it only works with shitty beer... er... I mean Heineken. The third problem? It doesn't even come with beer? So you shelled out almost $300 and what do you have to show for it? This ugly thing that is sure to take up lots of precious counter space and dispense--at best-- a mediocre brew. No thanks, Santa. How bout you get me a six pack of Allagash and we'll call it even?

Next: Waring Pro® Wine Chiller. Chill and serve wines at their proper temperature with this professional wine chiller. Its attractive classic design with streamlined body enhances table presentation beautifully. The LCD backlit screen displays preprogrammed temperatures for 33 varieties of red, white and Champagne wines from the MCU library database. $99.99



Seriously? For just twice the price of this completely idiotic gift, you could buy a really nice wine cellar, which stores and cools 25 bottles of wine. I mean, if you want that bottle of red to be perfectly chilled for dinner? Throw it in the fridge for five minutes. Seriously. And it won't even set you back an entire Benjamin. Again, Santa? If you want to get me something nice, a case of Two Buck Chuck from Trader Joe's will be graciously accepted in lieu of this glorified electronic ice bucket.

Next: simplehuman® 14-Ounce Sensor Soap Dispenser: This cutting-edge soap dispenser from simplehuman® brings sleek style and modern technology to your home's functional products. This sensor dispenser automatically releases hand soap, dish soap or lotion and even has an indicator light that activates when soap is released. When the timer is activated, light blinks for 20 seconds to indicate when hands are clean. $39.99




For $40 a robot better actually wash my hands for me. A blinking light to tell me when my hands are clean? Just... go to hell, Santa.

Okay, I could go on, as I'm only on page 8 of this 24 page ad, but I just don't have the energy to continue.

I'm signing off this blog post with some words to the manufacturers of these asinine products: If you are trying to come up with gifts for "the people who have everything"--just stop. People Who Have Everything do not have room for useless crap in their homes. (Their Cool Stuff is taking up all the room. Duh.)

I never was very fond of ham

I just wrote a blog about how I'm sick and blah blah blah WHO CARES? I'm not going to bore you with my aches and pains. Instead I will share with you a not so fond memory from my childhood.


In town to celebrate Thanksgiving and my birthday, my grandparents were staying with us for a few days. The family was seated at the table for dinner, a day or two before Turkey Day. I was probably about 7-years-old.

A tall glass of red Kool-Aid and a plate of ham sat before me. I took one bite of the ham and pushed it away.

"It's too salty!" I exclaimed in disgust.

"It is not. Now eat your dinner," either my mom or dad insisted.

"No... it's gross! I can't eat it."

"Just drink your Kool-Aid and take a few more bites."

Begrudgingly, I was obedient. I swallowed the Kool-Aid and ate a few small bites of the ham.

"I don't feel so good..."

Okay, the details get a little bit fuzzy here. But the image of Kool-Aid-colored vomit is still quite vivid in my memory.

It was probably just a coincidence, but I blame that flu--which knocked me out of commission for my birthday and Thanksgiving--on that damn ham, and indirectly on my parents for making me eat it, of course.

That flu was quite a doozy. I couldn't keep down anything. Any. Thing. In fact, it was during that very flu that I first experienced the joys that are suppositories. You want to hear a kid scream bloody murder? Suppositories are the way to go.

Get your scarf on!

I'm getting my scarf on! Who is with me? Join Sarah Marie's scarf swap! You crafty kids can even swap a handmade scarf! (ahem, Kyla)

Check Sarah Marie's blog for more details! You have until Nov. 30 to sign up.

What do we want? EQUAL RIGHTS! When do we want them? NOW!

Last Saturday was my first protest. Andrew and I took to the streets of the Oakland neighborhood of Pittsburgh to show our support for the overturning of proposition 8. I wasn't sure if there would be a large crowd, but I was pleased to hear a total of 450 people attended. Now 450 people might not sound like much compared to the crowds that flocked to protests in Chicago and cities around California, but remember Pittsburgh is a small town with a big city complex.

Because it was raining and I wanted to travel as lightly as possible, I didn't bring a camera to the protest. The photos below were borrowed from bombnomnom's Flickr. I didn't ask for permission to use these photos on my blog because I could not find a way to contact him and I am probably the only person left on the planet without a flickr account.





For more photos of the Pittsburgh protest, go here.

To my knowledge, only one mainstream Pittsburgh news outlet covered the event, but I guess one is better than none.

If you wanted to take part in the protest but couldn't for any reason, you have a second chance. The next national protest will take place January 10. Find out more on jointheimpact.com.

Again, I want to thank Rachel for telling me about the protest. This is why I love our blogging community so much. We really can make a difference.

Speaking of making a difference, have you donated to Rachel's fundraiser for lupus yet? Anything you can afford to contribute brings her one step closer to her goal.

Oh hell, why not

Lacey tagged me for a meme that I've done before, but it won't hurt to do it again.

P.S. A very short recap of the Prop 8 protest is on the way tomorrow. I just haven't had the time. Thanks for everyone's comments wondering how it turned out.

6 Random Things About Mermanda

1. I don't get as excited about the holidays as I used to as a child. I think this is true for a lot of adults, but I really miss the holiday rush. I like to think the spark of the holidays will return when I have children with whom I can share the traditions. I can't wait to start leaving cookies out for Santa again and carrots for the reindeer!

2. If you find a hair in your food while you are eating with me, try not to draw too much attention to this fact, or I will more than likely gag and/or throw up on the spot.

3. I have left a gigantic three-wicked candle burning overnight--not once--but TWICE. How I did not burn down the house either time is beyond me. Here's hoping there's not a third time.

4. I've been eating salads for lunch for about two months. I am officially SICK of salads. Someone please suggest a healthy lunch alternative that will not bore the crap out of my taste buds.

5. If I could live somewhere that has all of the seasons except winter, and convince my family to move with me, that, my friends, would be heaven.

6. I cringe when Andrew watches dumb TV like "The Pickup Artist" but I find it impossible to turn away from them.

20SB Blog Swap: Lifetime Original World

Todays guest post is brought to you by Holly
from "Holly Grande". This is all part of the 20 Something Bloggers "Blog Swap 3". Don't forget to go check out my post, "Quarter-Life Nose Piercing over on her site.

Hi folks! My name is Holly, from hollygrande.com, and I have a confession: I love Lifetime Original Movies. I know, I know, they're Lifetime Original Movies, but there is something addictive about them. You turn on a Sunday afternoon teen pregnancy marathon, and you're hooked. Plain Truth, She's Too Young, and 15 and Pregnant: all timeless classics.

My favorite Lifetime Original of late, however, is Fab Five: The Texas Cheerleader Scandal. This movie is made of pure win. In it, five delightfully nasty girls bully their peers, teachers and even parents. These girls take raunchy photos, spill dirty secrets and attempt to take down the only two teachers who are not afraid of the teenage terrors. But the absolute best part? Much like the 1992 classic Willing to Kill: The Texas Cheerleader Story, Fab Five, is based on a true story of scandalous Texas cheerleaders.

Yes. YES. This Lifetime Original deserves an all-caps affirmative.

In college, my roommates Cassy, Katy, Erin and I would sit down and watch Lifetime on the weekends. We'd bundle up on the couch under blankets and kick the boys out of the den so we could get our weekend Lifetime fix, because that's when the good ones play. In fact, if you're really lucky, you might even catch a Candace Cameron marathon.

Oh yes, D.J. Tanner is a Lifetime superstar. Her credentials include No One Would Tell, Freshman Fall and my personal favorite: Visitors of the Night, Lifetime's attempt at a sci-fi thriller. D.J. Tanner is haunted by strange dreams and missing time. Why you ask? Not due to dissociative disorder, alcohol or any other usual Lifetime Original trope, no: D.J. is visited in the night…by aliens. YES.

Lifetime Original Movies may not be very good, or even moderately good for that matter, but they are…like that grody sweatshirt you've had since college. It's dated and a little fuzzy, but comfortable and familiar. You know that someone's going to jail in a Lifetime Original, the lead character will get her kids back and the baby born to a 15-year-old will find a living home in an open adoption. Maybe, in that way, the Lifetime Original World is an ideal version of our own.

Thanks, Mermanda, for letting me borrow a bit of your blog, and here's to the next 20SB Blog swap!

BlogSecret: Work moron

The following is an anonymous post that I am hosting for BlogSecret. To view a list of all participating blogs, visit the blog of the BlogSecret organizer, Nilsa.


Yep. This is a post about work. Like many bloggers, I don't post about work on my blog, lest I get Dooced. Thanks to this ingenious idea by Nilsa, we can talk about secrets anonymously. I wonder how many participants of Blog Secret will post about work?

I landed a new job and have been there for a few months. Much better hours, much better pay, with even an opportunity to become a part-owner in a couple of short years. Sounds perfect right? It is, except for the office manager.

Who is the owners daughter. In just the short time that I've been there, I have learned an incredible amount about her. Namely, that she is in way over her head. She'll come to me and say something like, "This is the only way it can be, and you'll have to just accept it." Which will naturally prompt a question from me along the lines of "Why?" Her only answer is to say that she doesn't know and I'll have to talk to so-and-so. This little exchange happened about three times before I couldn't take it anymore and I asked her if it was because she didn't understand why it had to be a certain way. At least she admitted it.

Also, because she works in Daddy's office, she thinks that gives her the right to come and go as she pleases. Soon after I started working there, I learned that she was moving in a few weeks. Never before have I seen a move fraught with so much angst. She actually appeared in my office in tears at one point. I'm not above crying at work, but I do it in the bathroom. I don't spread it to someone else's office. So the move date came and she thought she needed a whole week's vacation to deal with it. That's fine; spend your vacation how you want. But when she was supposed to come back the next week? Oh, no. She needed another three days to deal with her period. Then this week, she left one day after lunch for the day. The following day she was gone all morning. The reason? For a massage, chiropractic adjustment, and a visit with her personal trainer. Gee, the rest of us have to do those things after work.

She is continually taking advantage of the other girls, which really pisses me off the most. As I just mentioned, she was able to take a whole week's vacation whenever she damn well pleased. One of the girls doesn't get *any* vacation until she's been there for a whole year. Another wants to take a week vacation just once. Last year, she was forced to take off five consecutive Fridays. This year, she can only take a Thurs/Fri, a weekend, and a Monday, surrounding when Daddy won't be there. I thought the term office manager meant that you knew how to do everything in the office. Especially an office as small as ours. She can barely handle her own job, let alone know how to do someone else's.

Before she got a job in daddy's office, she used to teach pre-school. At four pre-schools, to be exact. She got fired from all of them, as I was informed by one of the other girls in the office. Fired because she preached about God to the kids. Oh, yes. She's a Bible-thumpin, "God is good" spewin, Christian fundamentalist 40-year old virgin who has never dated.

When I take over the business, letting her go will be one of the first changes I make. I had to promise that to the other girls, or they promised to leave.

I owe many, many thanks to Nilsa for letting me get this off my chest. It felt great.

101 Things in 1001 Days

(Track my progress! Completed items are in bold.) End Date: August 14, 2011 PHILANTHROPY & ACTS OF KINDNESS 1. Give a gift through Heifer (three times)(1/3) 2. Buy a surgery with Operation Smile 3. Continue to support St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital monthly for 1001 days 4. Sponsor a child through Feed the Children 5. Donate blood 6. Race for the cure (or other worthy cause) March For Babies 7. Buy a homeless person a hot meal 8. Send an anonymous gift 9. Perform random act of kindness (3/10) Locations: -Pamela's Diner -Target -Fifth Avenue parking meter 10. Tip 50 percent for exceptional service 11. Adopt a dog from a shelter or rescue (LUKE!) FAMILY 12. Take a trip with my mom 13. Take my dad to “Bacon Night” (Harris Grill, Shadyside) 14. Take my sister on an outing (5 times) 15. Take my parents out to dinner (mom's 52nd birthday at Mad Mex) 16. Clear out junk from my parents’ basement FITNESS 17. Do 100 push-ups 18. Complete couch to 5K 19. Run a 5K 20. Get buff (abs, tone arms) 21. Play tennis (ten times) YUM YUMS 22. Make one of my grandma’s recipes 23. Bake a pumpkin pie 24. Be a vegetarian for one week (3 times) 25. Go to a wine tasting (New allergy to sulfites derailed this one...) 26. Drink Sake 27. Drink a fabulous Bloody Mary 28. Make fudge 29. Bake an apple pie 30. Drink an extra dirty martini It was a little TOO dirty for my taste. Shudder. 31. Make sushi 32. Make a pizza from scratch 33. Eat caviar 34. Learn to poach an egg 35. Bake bread 36. Eat a peanut butter bacon banana sandwich (Andrew's family's favorite treat) FUN 37. Learn to ski 38. Learn to surf 39. Wear false eyelashes 40. Go snorkeling 41. Play in the rain 42. Jitterbug with Andrew 43. Go to a Steelers game (Thanks, Bruce!) 44. Go to a Penguins game 45. Be a groupie for Andrew’s band 46. Go to dance club with Andrew 47. Attend a blogger meetup 48. Go to bingo night 49. Have lunch with a friend (12/30 times) 50. Have “girls weekend” reunion with Jeffies (friends from college) CREATIVITY 51. Take a pottery class 52. Decoupage something for myself 53. Make a wreath for each season (1/4) 54. Finish crocheting my afghan 55. Learn to crochet a hat 56. Develop system to remember important dates (bdays, anniversaries, etc.) 57. Have a poem published 58. Write at least two freelance articles TRAVEL/CULTURE 59. Get my passport 60. Travel abroad 61. Drive down the coast of California 62. Visit Philadelphia museum of art 63. Visit Millennium Park, Art Institute of Chicago, and the Museum of Contemporary Art 64. Give Andrew a tour of my college town, Athens, Ohio 65. Travel by train 66. See Sufjan Stevens perform live 67. See Josh Ritter perform with a full orchestra 68. See Rent 69. See Phantom of the Opera 70. Go to a musical production at my old high school 71. Actively plan a trip to Europe LOVE & MARRIAGE 72. Get engaged 73. Take engagement portraits 74. Plan a peacock-themed wedding 75. Make DIY wedding items Nope. But other people did! I know how to delegate. Thanks, Jack! 76. Get married 77. Honeymoon in Hawaii (subject to change) Riviera Maya, Mexico BEING GREEN 78. Find a thrift shop treasure 79. Go antiquing (Does it count if I found it on Craigslist?) 80. Shop at farmer’s market (3 times) 81. Cancel all of my catalog subscriptions 82. Compost 83. Become a member of the local co-op MISC. 84. Get certified for CPR again 85. Read 50 books in one year 86. Watch a sunrise 87. Watch a sunset 88. Complete a New York Times crossword puzzle (1st of many?) 89. Go to church (3/30 times) 90. Identify 100 things that make me happy 91. SECRET (I might tell you if you ask me nicely. Privately.) 92. Write a living will and have notarized 93. Find out my blood type 94. Keep orchid alive for 1001 days FAIL! 95. Go one week with hitting snooze (3 times) 96. Make online portfolio 97. Get a second tattoo (perhaps a mermaid?) 98. Implement a savings plan to buy a house (Closed on house May 29, 2009) 99. Have white teeth 100. Frame mermaid/fisherman paintings 101. Have giveaway on my blog with handmade prizes

Joining the Impact

P.S. Ignore the hair. Please. I don't want to talk about it.

The Fishtaco needs more salsa stat, over

Have you heard the Obama family's secret service codenames yet?

From BBC NEWS:

The not-so-secret code names used by the US Secret Service for the president-elect and his family have been published.

Barack Obama is called Renegade, while his wife Michelle is Renaissance, and their daughters Rosebud and Radiance.

They will replace Trailblazer (President George W Bush) and his wife Tempo in the White House on 20 January.

The names are chosen to be easily pronounced and understood when agents use radio communications.

So what would your codename be?

Andrew says his would be Fishtaco.

My friend Greg would like to go by Ringworm.

Me? Princess Consuela Banana Hammock, of course!

Inauguration Day

I received some exciting news yesterday. Andrew's aunt and uncle are letting us crash in their Virginia home for a few days for the Inauguration festivities. I'm pretty sure Andrew and I will be spending Saturday-Tuesday in the D.C. area--being all cute and touristy and what not.

If any of you will be in the Capital too, let me know. I smell a bloggy happy hour.

P.S. My team captain gave me her pedometer. I am getting in the habit of taking it off before visiting the bathroom.

P.P.S. I'm just about done with the 101 things in 1001 days. I swear I didn't forget.

Today is not a good day Or: "Eliminated" from the contest

Ladies and gentlemen, it is over. I think I just eliminated myself from the contest. Just had to fish my pedometer out of the toilet. At work. My hand was in a public toilet. And let me just add, this was after I did my business. I washed my hands five times in boiling hot water, and used about an ounce of hand sanitizer. Someone please chop off my hand. I still feel extremely dirty. I guess I won't be winning any Nike duffel bags or cliff bars. Sorry, team. (And to anticipate your questions: I threw the pedometer away in one of those sanitary product receptacles in the stall.) Feeling a bit like Eeyore today, you guys.

I'm going all Civil Rights on your ass

Rachel told me about the national day of protest for Prop. 8. Across the country, this Saturday, people are going to unite to speak out against California's ban on gay marriage and similar acts that were passed in several other states on election day.

Pittsburghers: Join me at Schenley Plaza, Oakland, at 1:30 p.m. on Nov. 15.

Everyone else, check this web site for more information and to find your protest location: http://jointheimpact.com/

Get fired up!

Keith Olbermann on Prop 8

"This is not about yelling, and this is not about politics..."

Please watch.

What is with today and this pin?

Okay. I mentioned it before. My dentist is kind of an asshole. I don't know his politics but something in my gut told me to take off my pin before setting foot in his office today. I shrugged off my gut feeling and wore it proudly as I walked up to the sign-in window. My dentist was talking to the receptionist and quickly noticed the Obama button on my coat. "Looks like we have ourselves a happy camper," the dentist said smugly. (I am not making this up.) "LET'S KILL HER!" exclaimed the receptionist. "I'm kidding... I'm kidding," she added sheephishly. Wtf? Seriously. WTF? So now I am thinking to myself, should I have taken the pin off? I mean, this man has the power to inflict a lot of pain on me. (I'm going back in a week to have a filling patched. I apparently grind my teeth at night. Who knew?) Stay tuned for more Obama button stories. As I think this is just the beginning...

No I Won't!

This morning, I was waiting in line to order a cup of coffee when a grizzly looking man approached me. He was dressed as what appeared to be some sort of lumberjack (what? don't all lumberjacks wear red and black flannel?) and was staring at my Obama pin.



Lumberjack: That's a nice pin, but you know, you can take it off now.
Me: Oh, no. I think I'll keep it on.
Lumberjack: I mean, it makes me happy too... but you can still take it off.
Me: Nope. I'm leaving it on. Thanks.

Letters from Canada

EDIT: This post has been edited to show only Canadian views on Obama's election.


What does an Obama presidency mean to our neighbors up North? Below are the words of Kyla Bea, Ben, and Hillary. I hope you enjoy reading their words as much as I did. These words are directly from the hearts of people from the Canadian Prairies; Halifax, Nova Scotia; and Vancouver, British Columbia.


Kyla Bea says:

More than anything, for me Obama's presidency means a shift away from fear.

The feeling I've had as someone from the outside of the US is that over the past few years the US has been evolving into more and more of a closed state. Crossing the border in a car is more stressful than it has been before, I have friends who've had their cars stripped down to the point that border guards pull the interior panels off their doors and leave them to piece it together. Friends of my family have been separated from their 12 and 13 year old daughters for hours while they're all questioned separately for no apparent reason.

I'm aware that Canadian citizens have been detained indefinitely by US officials in Guantanamo Bay. That taking a laptop on a road trip to the US can mean that its entire contents can be copied and filed against me. That our government is too scared to say anything to the Bush administration that would offend them. I take my nose ring out
when we cross the border, I don't want to draw attention to myself.

To me, Obama means having a President who seems honestly interested in the plight of the people who make up the United States. He wants to listen. To respond. To be honest with his citizens and the world. He is empathetic, sophisticated, intelligent. He really believes in what America can be, and he wants to work on it. To me, Obama is someone who people want to work hard for, someone whose advice the public would willingly take. He's a modern man, and seems like an even more modern leader.

He's taking basic principles of living a good life—kindness, honestly, humility—and applying them to the highest office in the country. It's an approach that is compelling in its utter simplicity and poignancy.

I'm a political science major, and my husband is a dual citizen so much of my immediate family lives in Florida. I want to love you guys so much, you're such a part of everything the my country & my family does. I just think that this Obama gentleman is going to be much easier on my heart.

Ben says:

Over the summer, I had dinner with a couple visiting from the United States. Now, don't get me wrong, I have American relatives and no underlying bias against them - well, no more than the average Canadian - but I nearly offed myself with the salad fork about thirty-two times.

These were the ultimate, hyper-stereotype of Americans. They spent the entire dinner discussing how much bigger the portions would be in the States, asking the waitress why she wouldn't accept American money instead of our funny money, how silly it is that we have a French province - I mean why wouldn't we make them speak English? - and how awful and unpatriotic Obama supporters are.

Yeah.

Obama becoming president gives me hope that Americans are beginning to take pride in not only their country but also in how their country fits in with the rest of the world. That it's not only about staying true to their American roots but also being sensitive, encouraging and accepting of others. I just don't see Obama visiting France and saying - "This pastry ain't nowhere near what desserts taste like in the States!"

Canada spent the past eight years shuddering when someone mentioned the president. Canada spent the past three and a half years worrying about what was to come. Canada spent the past four months fearing another term featuring laughable politicians (more Palin than McCain). And it's not all over. Canada is still watching in awe as select states vote to take away civil rights - and don't even try to tell me that Proposition 8 is anything but that.

Nonetheless, Obama has inspired the United States to care, to talk, to debate, and to really look at where they fit in and where they are going. For that, he gains a lot of respect from his Northern neighbours.

Hillary says:

Even though Canada has its own identity, it's naive to think that we are not influenced by the States. This is why I am so excited that Obama has been elected President. As a woman, I'm happy that Obama supports women's rights under Roe vs Wade. Roe vs Wade inspired Dr. Henry Morgentaler to challenge Canada's abortion law, which resulted in the law being declared invalid. I am scared that if Roe vs Wade is reversed, it will provide ammunition for pro-life organisations to challenge Canada's stance on women's right to choose.

This is only one of the many reasons I am excited to see Obama elected.


PS to Mermanda: This cracks me up:

Educational Background:
Barack Obama:
Columbia University - B.A. Political Science with a Specialization in International Relations
Harvard - Juris Doctor (J.D.) Magna Cum Laude

Joseph Biden: University of Delaware - B.A. in History and B.A. in Political Science
Syracuse University College of Law - Juris Doctor (J.D.)

vs.

John McCain: United States Naval Academy - Class rank: 894 of 899

Sarah Palin: Hawaii Pacific University - 1 semester
North Idaho College - 2 semesters - general study
University of Idaho - 2 semesters - journalism Matanusk

Disgusting, Sickening, Unbelievable

This makes me want to knock my computer off the desk. With a baseball bat.



And to all of you people telling us to "stop gloating," "stop celebrating," and whatever other nonsense you are spewing, let me just tell you one thing:

I will wake up each day for the next four years, perhaps eight if we are lucky, celebrating. You can see it in my face and I can feel it in my heart. THIS is what I've been waiting for. This is what so many of us have been waiting for. And I will celebrate! You will never stop me.

EDIT: "Obama is my homeboy." Just noticed that one. :)

My love letter to the USA

Dear America,

Thank you. You've blown me away. You've moved me to tears. I am head over heels for you.

Love,
Mermanda

P.S. Say it with me: "President Obama." Totally awesome, right?




Now THAT is a good looking first family!

Yes We Can!

I wanted to share this in case I am not the only one who is just watching this for the first time.



Beautiful.

I Voted.

Did you?

P.S. Where is my sticker? Lame.

Hair Tantrum Part II

Guys? Remember when my hair was at an all-time high of stupidness? Well, I've out-stupided myself this time. You may recall a certain Natalie Dee comic that "convinced" me to grow my hair long--even though I had already given up on such nonsense. Well, that was then and this is stupid. I can't walk around looking like this anymore. I have a mullet, and I'm not even wearing Andrew's Billy Ray Cyrus wig. Things are getting scary. I caught my reflection in a window this afternoon on the way to a meeting. It wasn't pretty. I wanted to shave my head on the spot. Instead, I powered through the meeting, looking pretty dang weird, and called my stylist after the meeting to schedule an appointment for Friday. The last time I complained about my dumb hair, Sarah suggested I go with this look: Kirsten Storms And someone else (sorry! forget who you were, you wonderful person!) suggested this: Elisha Cuthbert But then there was Allison, who thought I should just go back to my old lover: Mandy Moore So what do you all think? If you have other ideas, send them my way. Just know that there is quite a bit of mullet to work with. Quite. A. Bit. Thanks! I trust and value your advice on this very important matter.

A Very Hannah Montana Halloween

This is going to be a short and sweet Halloween review. Ready? Let's begin!

I dressed up as Hannah Montana on Halloween and the day after for our friends' first annual Halloween party. I wore the costume while giving out candy to the trick-or-treaters, and guess what, you guys? They loooooved me! When the first group of kids instantly recognized me, I knew immediately that my costume was going to be a smashing hit. One little girl was kind of convinced that I was actually Hannah. She ran up to me (like, was inches from my face) squealing, "HANNAH!!! I LOVE YOU!!! I WATCH YOUR SHOW EVERY DAY!!!!!" Totally precious.


I later calculated that this costume cost me about $45. Not cool.



Oh, look who I found! Another Hannah! And is that... my daddy?

Billy Ray Cyrus! Hannah Montana Sandwich!



Apple bobbing contest! Tip: Get in there quickly before other people have a chance to spit in the tub.



Post-bobbing victory shot. I got the winning apple!



After being accused of cheating (how the hell do you cheat at bobbing for apples?) I decided to be the bigger person and share my prize caramel turtle apples with the whiny Scarecrow.



Incest is no laughing matter, but come on! This is funny.


Now for some of my favorite costumes of the weekend:

Sexy Hamburglar and Gallagher



Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?



This is my friend Jess, dressed up as a generic 80's lady. I actually informed her that she was a dead-ringer for Claudia of Baby-Sitter's Club fame.



Uncanny, right?